Entry: Perhaps I've just lost my touch. Sunday, March 18, 2007



Maybe I never update because nothing that exciting ever happens to me.  Honestly, I think the most exciting part of my day is when I tear a page off of my desk calendar, revealing the grammar rule for the day … I happen to know people who would rather stare at a blank wall.  As a result, I stopped writing letters to people because there was simply nothing to write about – who wants to read about how I needed to get rid of my Dinex dollars so I bought 12 bottles of water?  (Plus, even 39 cent stamps add up to a significant amount of money for a poor college student.  Perhaps I should convert to keeping in touch with e-mails.)  When I do finally catch up with friends, however, I am shocked to find that so much has happened to them that they can’t even remember all of the stories they have to tell.

Last night, while everyone else had news about major changes in their lives, my conversations went more like this:

Me:  HEY!  HOW ARE YOU!?

Them:  Good!!!  What’s going on with you!!?

Me:  Oh … Nothing …

And then I smiled awkwardly and looked for the next person that I had to “catch up with.”

WATCHING the musical for the first time in years was such a strange experience for me.  Sitting in the audience, I felt like such a has-been alumna and at times was rather jealous of those on stage, wishing I were still a local star.  It’s funny how you can go from being a somebody who is relatively well-known to being a nobody who has to work again to earn a place of importance.  When can I keep that place for good?  Will I even achieve it again?  Have I ever achieved a place at the top?  Is change even a sure sign of progress?  Should I be glad that drama merely dances around me?

I promise that the next time I write I’ll have something exhilarating to talk about.  (But most likely, I’ll just ramble again … Or else you’ll be waiting for a long, LONG time before you hear from me.)  In the meantime, I would love to hear from you.

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